Haha and my daughter wonders where she gets her “wierd”_ness from…


Wholly fuck balls, Gromit… (had to switch it up for Shits & Giggles) How does a person go from zero to hangover, after only 4 glasses of Gin & 7-Up – over a period of about 9 hrs & counting… as the nausea continues… & the sleep resists the urge to set in???

I think I’ve got your answer, Wallace: (because we all know he’s no idiot) don’t stop taking your meds just so you can drink that night… Just because  the big 30 is lurking in the shadows of Sunday… And perhaps next time try them… Mixed! (just kidding, partially) And for Pete’s Sakes – (my gmas way of cursing… in aNother religion) Don’t decide to eat a microwaved personal pizza at 3:45 in the am, with the intent to soak up some of the alcohol (where would you ever get such an idea)….especially when the tomato sauce reminds you of spaghetti & makes you want to Ralph on a non-drinking, totally normal, pill popping day!!!

And Wallace: just one small lil reminder for the remainder of this day … this fine Saturday…and the shenanigans certain to occur later on this evening: please refrain from FB’ing any of your FB (FB =cause I like the look of it…it almost looks…dirty) Friends: or post slanderous & highly rhetorical Questions in your status… As I’m sure all those who have & will for-n-ever more look up to you will read them & be completely astonished at the intricacies of your mind, while ….shall we say; altered; in a less than healthful way…and then send you straight back to the kooo-kooo-ka-choo hen-house… Or as we insiders, on the outside call it “the big house”

But seriously folks – only cause the out-patient building is smaller than the in-patient hospital’s actual bldg size. (its NoT prison…although I hear that at least – tHeRe you GET to have … Well ya know…) ok, too far?

Just going back over my mental notes here: have I ever mentioned working for a company called S&G’s… Yeah, it’s true. And even though the owners claimed it stood for Sam & Gus’s… We all could tell it was doomed from the application…. Gus ended up in a “Big House” somewhere and Sam…??? I don’t know… Probably still on the pot! (not weed you nimrods=the water closet, porcelain thrown, my pillow tonight!)

On second thought: “soaking up the alcohol” may not have been such a terrible idea: maybe though… Just maybe… You should eat something before you get down & dirty with that first (martini – tonight – since you already proclaimed your drink of choice for the night to follow before the current night had concluded)…

And quite honestly that means more than a “fruit & yogurt parfait” from McD’s… Especially when that’s all you ate the entire day leading up to  this in.famous evening/morning you are experiencing all alone in the darkness for fear of waking D, who let me remind you …is the person who got completely exhausted & passed out after hearing you tell the cliff’s notes to your “britanica”-like life’s story… & to think; you only started with the position you held @ ….

Ps: Excedrin has caffeine in it, ya dumbass! May eventually kick that headache away, but somewhat doubtful cause your just gonna vomit into the toilet, after your otherwise empty, gin soaked stomach lining gets a taste of it! Grrr.

And you’re turning how old? Epic Fail!! on the drinking lessons learned…thus far…

 

 

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~ by Flawless Destiny on February 22, 2012.

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